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betsy mctiernan's avatar

Super Wow! This essay is so honest and courageous. And so true for many of us—70 somethings. I love how you weave the past, present and the possible future re: food and sleep. Unless we have to work at Walmart because our social security checks are all we have, restlessness can become a daily companion. Taking restlessness for a meander is a great idea.

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

I hadn't thought of it as restlessness. That gives me a whole new approach. But I do think meandering is an underexplored practice.

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betsy mctiernan's avatar

I like to meander, too. And when I’m feeling restless, it’s calming. When I’m feeling lonely, I feel comforted by seeing other people going about their biz.

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

I like to sit on my balcony here in Minnesota and watch people and geese walking by.

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betsy mctiernan's avatar

Sounds perfect. Eye meandering.

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Jinks Hoffmann's avatar

This is so honest, Susie, and so filled with unsentimental self-compassion, it is inspiring. Truly, bless you!

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

It’s a subject that seems to hit home with quite a few people. It’s satisfying to feel that resonance. Thank you.

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Patricia Boynton's avatar

I have never weighed this much in my entire life. After Chris died I did not eat to the point of not being able to swallow which required “ballooning” my esophagus open. Now I AM the balloon😁🎈

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

That's been my experience. "Ordinary" challenges, sadness, anxiety lead to overeating. Huge sadness is met by an inability to get anything down.

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Rebecca Kalb's avatar

This really spoke to me. I too was offered bribes to eat when I was a child. Only $1 which I thought was a lot but your dad outdid that. It didn’t get me to eat. I don’t think $5 would have worked either. I’m gonna try some meandering.

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

In my opinion, meandering is good for everything that ails you. It's amazing to me how fraught life can be even when one is blessed with good health. Even entertainments make demands. Looking makes no demands.

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B L's avatar

A courageous, powerful post.

I suspect many of us are surprised at some point when we look into the mirror and see our mothers looking back.

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

It's a mixed bag for me since my mother lived to 99. That's a lot of pressure!

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Zingy Guy's avatar

Susie, Another one of your best! zingy guy

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Susie Kaufman's avatar

Thanks, Larry. Eating and sleeping can really gang up on you.

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